They prance in distinctive ways, have shiny black noses (no
Rudolph tonight) and are clearly not a cohesive, cooperative crew
of reindeer, as legend would have them. They are a collection of
stylish, skilled actors.
The set for “The Eight: Reindeer Monologues” is carefully set
awry with a fallen Christmas tree; a headless doll; a broken,
striped North Pole (with a note to repair by 2013); and TV screens
showing Radio North Pole. Frosty the reporter says Santa’s not
speaking — but Dasher will speak. (Eventually each of them speaks
alone.)
It’s nearly Christmas and the elves are on strike as the Edge
Theatre opened to a Nov. 18 sold out house.
Playwright, screenwriter, award winner, cynic Jeff Goode
introduces Dasher, Donner, Dancer, Vixen, Blitzen, Hollywood, Comet
and Cupid — one at a time — to tell their stories about life at
Santa’s workshop.
While funny part of the time, they’re a fairly nasty herd. With
each, we get an appropriate “deer in the headlights” look to close
out the monologue.
Dasher (Mike Kienker) appears, scowling. “One time, I wasn’t
lead ...one foggy Christmas Eve... I don’t want to talk about it.”
He continues to talk about “fat boy’s” misdeeds and stomps off.
To be followed by a prancing Cupid (Eric Ross) who overplays the
gay bit and claims Mrs. S has made advances... but not Santa.
Hollywood, actor Scott Bellot, nattily dressed with shades and
scarf, offers his slant on what goes on at the workshop in a
different style.
Donner (James O’Hagen Murphy) rails against the Rudolph movie
and claims racism in the film industry, where no reindeer has ever
been nominated for an award. Donner wants to make a movie. “If
Vixen sells her story to the network...”
Kirsten Deane, as Blitzen, announces “The sleighride is over —
jolly fat pervert!” End of Act I.
Act II opens with more news announcements (Murphy is the
newscaster) and a story of a Christmas Crisis in Crumpet City.
We meet a frowning Comet, a tough guy biker type who says he
belonged to Hell’s Herd as a young buck. He has found religion,
sort of, and wears a chain and heavy cross, while crossing himself
at every mention of St. Nick, who saved his life.
Dancer (Rachel Graham) enters en pointe, but prancing too. She
talks about why you’ve never seen a reindeer ballet and refuses to
participate in the strike. Moves like a ballerina through her
scene. Seems especially vulnerable.
Donner (James O’Hagen Murphy) says he was an unemployed herd
deer when Santa appeared and told him his son Rudolph would be
displayed.
Glamorous, wounded Vixen tells of Mrs. Santa’s intense jealousy
and dislike.
“I gave at the office,” she said, adding that she’d asked
Blitzen not to go through with the strike — “Goodbye.”
Each monologue is a self-contained package, although there are
cross-references among stories. For the audience who has had a fill
of saccharinity, this may be an answer, although there is an
overriding ick element. Edgy, yes.
“The Eight: Reindeer Monologues” by Jeff Goode plays through
Dec. 18 at Edge Theater, 9797 W. Colfax Ave., Lakewood. Rick
Yaconis, of Highlands Ranch, directs. Special performance New
Year’s Eve, followed by a party ($30). Performances: 8 p.m.
Fridays, Saturdays; 6 p.m. Sundays. Tickets: $18/$14. For more
information: www.theedgetheatre.com or 303-232-0363.